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“Settle” is not a comfortable word.

It’s not a word you ever want used to describe you, coming from anyone else. It’s an even worse word when you’re using it to express your fears.

I feel like I settled when I…

I feel like I settled in my…

What does settling really imply? That we didn’t believe we were worth it? We didn’t believe we were worth the energy or the effort? We didn’t believe we were worth the time?

Or just simply, that I, we, didn’t believe we were worthy at all.

I want you to take a really deep breath, and courageously reach deep down into your spirit.

What are the things you’ve always told yourself you didn’t need, didn’t deserve, weren’t necessary?

I have had a friend who almost gave herself an ulcer over buying a used car, because it was an eight-year-old, luxury SUV. She was so hung up on the fact it was a luxury brand, she couldn’t focus on the fact that her business was growing, and she could afford the car out of her business income, not even touching her J-O-B income. That was a huge victory, but she was scared to trust it.  I’ve also had friends who were so hung up on using labels and brands to define themselves, they felt that if they weren’t wearing those labels or those brands, they didn’t matter.

Both groups are operating from a fear-based mentality: what is outside of me, defines me.

One was scared that the car would somehow morph her into the Queen Bee bullies she experienced in her childhood.

The other(s) were scared that if their labels and brands were to be stripped away, so would their value.

Neither is correct.

Your value, my dear friend, is inherent because you are a divinely created, powerfully purposed, and passionately loved child of GOD. There is a GOD-sized calling on your life because you were created with a GOD-sized purpose, to make a GOD-sized impact on the world around you.

Do you know the reason why 1 John 4:18 is one of my favorite verses? Because it’s a perspective changer:

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”


As soon as we take our eyes off the fact our purpose is rooted in God’s love, we are immediately operating from a place of fear.

You have been given too much authority in the Spirit to turn around and tell God that it wasn’t enough, that you have to perform your way into His will to be good enough.

You were shown too much love for you to cling to the beliefs about yourself formed from lies, guilt, shame, and condemnation that you have no value without a monetary investment.

The fact is, you weren’t worthy. I wasn’t worthy. The fear we have about our worth and our value is a generational curse because we carry the same shame of Adam and Eve – awareness of our own nakedness and exposure. Our freedom, our ability to enter back into an intimate relationship with our Creator is the result of Jesus ‘settling’ our debts in Colossians 2:13-14

“And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling (erasing, settling up) the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross.”

Stop telling yourself what you do and don’t deserve. All of those legal demands and stipulations were placed under Jesus’ hand and nailed to a wooden beam. None of us deserve His insane, radical graciousness and love. None of us are worthy of that sacrifice.

But because He chose us, He showed us our value.

You don’t have to settle in your life. You are promised an abundant life. You are promised that, inside His will, you will be the head and not the tail. You are promised, in His will, more than the eye can conceive or your ear has heard.

Stop selling yourself short.

Photo Credits: Avalon Photography