If you’ve had the opportunity to meet Natasha Graziano in person, or even online, you already know the type of energy she’s on. Natasha is the #1 female motivational speaker and mindset coach in the world, and she doesn’t take her job lightly.
Something she continues to do is empower audiences all around the world that they too can turn their life around for the better. From overcoming extreme poverty, a drug addiction, family trauma, and much more, Natasha shows us how she was able to manifest her current life: which includes scaling into an 8-figure business.
Scripting is one of her most powerful tools, which includes writing about your dream life in the future as if it already happened. In fact, she even did a Ted Talk on scripting!
Now, Natasha goes into mommy mode yet again as she prepares to birth her new baby girl with rapper Tyla Yahweh. He actually got on one knee and proposed to Natasha at their baby shower.. a complete surprise!
On the 66th episode of Shirley’s Temple, I spoke with Natasha Graziano about how she manifested her man, overcoming trauma, the importance of meditation, and more!
How does it feel to be having a girl?
I’m so excited, just having a child is beautiful. But the fact that I have the blessing to have a boy and having a girl, I’m just so grateful. I’m so excited. A mini-me. I hope she comes out with my hair. [laughs]
When did you find out?
I knew the day I conceived. That sounds weird.
Because you manifested it?
I manifested babe. 3 weeks before, I wrote it down. I didn’t want kids for 7 years. After my son: I love you. I’m a single mom and I am embracing life, I do not have the time. It’s too much for me to have more kids that I can’t give attention to, so I have a nanny and it was just too much. I wanted to be a really active mom. So gradually, I was really active with him. I met my guy. I was like, I’ll have a baby with you.
Literally the third day, right?
Yeah, we conceived on day 3. He was like, “I want to have a family too.” I’m like no, this for life. This isn’t a present because I’m not gonna raise it. If we’re going to do this, please, let’s try and do it for life. I was on my period for the first 5 days, so we couldn’t even have sex. That was good because it made him wait 5 days. [laughs]
We love making them wait!
That sounds batshit crazy. We were together every single day all the time. On date 2, he stayed the night and never went home. I made him sell his house.
How do you know that quickly?
That’s my most asked question. How do I know it’s the one? Because it feels amazing. It’s an inside feeling: this is my person. There’s no doubt like, “Oh, I don’t know about that. Or I don’t know about that.” Oh my god, I just want to be with you! And it’s not sexual. It’s everything. I want to spend time with you. I want to love on you. I want to be adored by you. I want to feel all these things with you. We couldn’t get enough of each other.
First of all, have you dated a rapper before?
Yes, I have. I swore I would never go there again. If you look at my career next to them, we couldn’t be more different. But we actually have a lot in common, me and Tyla for sure. Because we’re both spiritual. He loves the way I motivate him every day.
I want to give you your flowers because meeting you had such an impact on me. I opened up to you because we’re both addicts, you literally checked on me the next day. You didn’t ask what I was struggling with, thank you. Because you impact everyone you cross paths with.
I always aim to leave an impact on every person I encounter, whether it’s a waitress, or whether it’s a person that I meet in the street, or whether it’s a friend. I aim to leave them feeling elevated. We get a choice. When we go into a relationship or a friendship with somebody, or an encounter, a conversation, are you going to leave that with them feeling elevated? Which means you served your purpose as a human. You left them feeling better about themselves in some way. Or are you going to deflate them? You’re going to make them feel worse, are you going to bring down their energy and diminish their light?
We want to leave people feeling elevated. It’s why we’re here now. You elevated me. This woman is so cool, she’s my soul sister. You elevated the encounter, the experience we had together. Where so many people just go in for themselves, they don’t even think about the elevation. They think: “oh it’s another conversation. Who cares what I say to the waitress?” Are you kidding me? Every single person has a story. Elevate them! People, even if they didn’t know who I was, which obviously there’s a few billion people on this planet. So whenever I meet somebody who doesn’t know who I am, by the end of my conversation
they’re like, “Are you some kind of…?” They know. Yeah, that’s exactly what I do. And I’m glad that you knew that, because I don’t feel whole when I leave a conversation and someone thinks I’m another random thing with no purpose.
Loved your book Be It Until You Become It. How long did that take you?
About a year. There was so much happening in my life, and I’d been through so much. I just want to own who I am. I don’t want to be somebody that I’m not. I don’t like fake it till you make it, I also don’t believe in not sharing your story. Everybody has a story. Everybody has a story that we are meant to share with the world. Why? Because your story is going to change somebody else’s. Your story is going to have such a powerful imprint on somebody else’s life. That’s why it happened to you.
I know why the illness hit me. I know why I was at rock bottom and wanted to die. Why I was an addict. Why I went through the traumas I did. Why I was in hundreds of thousands of debt, why I became a single mom because I needed to share this story with the world. When I go on stage and I talk and I preach, I wouldn’t be able to do that if I didn’t have a story. They’d be like “Oh, look at her. You know, she’s got it all.” Well hang on a minute, honey, let me just go back five years. Let me show you a little picture of where I was five years ago, worse than anybody in that room hands down. That’s why I know it happened to me. Because I was meant to share it with the world. But before that, I was just a model. I thought I was you know, it’s all about me, I would wake up and life was like, “Oh, well, you know, what more can I do for me?” Whereas now it’s like, “What can I do to help someone today? How else can I go in the world and help another person today?”
I love that you overcame a drug addiction, people who aren’t addicts don’t understand how truly difficult that is. If you don’t mind me asking, how did yours evolve in the first place?
I was constantly partying. When you get too much into that same cycle, you’re keeping up with the Joneses. All of a sudden, what now happened was I got into a really bad career choice. I don’t know what came first, but it was all a mess. I was now a webcam girl. I did OnlyFans before it even existed, it was crazy. Okay, I’m not putting that down for anyone now, it was just the wrong choice for me. I was not proud of who I was. You’re up all night filming, it’s horrendous. So what do you do? You turn to a substance that’s going to keep you awake so you can make more money. You find yourself having to go and make more money to go — it’s a really bad vicious cycle. All of a sudden, you have a drug problem.
Was this back in the UK?
Yeah. That was when I was 23, 24.
On a positive tip, were you making bank as a webcam girl?
Oh girl, yes. I was making real bank, which is why it was so hard to give up. But I own it. People will be like, “Oh, Natasha was a porn star.” Honey, I never had sex with a man on camera. The guy you saw was someone I was with, who just leaked a sex tape. That was not a porn shoot. I don’t even understand that shit. No, I never did that. I did solo webcam stuff, and I own it. I go on stage and talk about it. There’s nothing that anybody can bring up because it’s from 10 years ago. There’s nothing anyone can say: “Oh, by the way, she did this.” Do you want to know the rest? I own who I am wholeheartedly. You can’t go into something and hide it. I own every part, there’s not one question someone could ask me that I will not talk about.
What’s the most you made?
From webcamming? Oh God. One month, probably near $100,000.00. It was really bad, it was terrible. But now I make that and more, from a beautiful line of work! That helps people. Where they wake up every day like, “Wow Natasha, you inspire me.” Some people will say “Oh, she did this,” oh then honey you’re not my audience. I’m not doing this for the small voices, I’m doing this for the masses. I’m doing this to change lives. I want to be the next Ghandi bitch.
At 12 years old, you couldn’t afford a candy bar from the vending machine. Did you ever think you’d be here now?
Yes and no. Yes, I knew I would be something great. No, financially, I did not know I would be that independent. Because I was raised to believe, by my family, by their family, by everything around me: you should marry a man for money. And I did. I’ve done that and I was so bored. That was the reason I got sick, because the universe was like: you’re out of alignment with where you’re meant to be. You’re meant to do something great with your life, go and be something great.
That’s when the rebirth of me happened. But I have to say, if I didn’t have the drug problem at the time, if I didn’t go through the crash, if I didn’t literally hit the floor in such a bad way where I found myself at rock bottom so badly, I wouldn’t have had the illness. The illness was where I had the breakthrough, standing in front of the mirror tears streaming down my face. Listening to Denzel Washington saying, I’m gonna get out of here. I’m gonna get out of this and I’m going to make my message. I’m going to show people how they can transform that illness or whatever it is they’re suffering from, into something amazing. And find that purpose in life like you have. I know I had to go through it to get here. I wasn’t going to find it in a high and a good time, or I wasn’t going to find it in just continuing the way I was. I needed to crash.
For a lot of addicts, it needs to be a life altering thing that happens to you. Otherwise, you’re stuck in a cycle.
It was the pregnancy that woke me up. It was the pregnancy that suddenly oh my God! I could feel my son moving. Ah, this is a real person. How can I think about doing another drug? I just switched off one day like, never again. And I haven’t touched it since.
You didn’t relapse at all?
I did. I relapsed once it was after he was born. Just one time, but I went right back. The answer to that is yes. Because I went through it, I can talk to it. It’s funny because I’ve almost deleted that time out of my brain. I’ve been clean for 8 years, so it’s more 7.5. But what happened was, I craved what everyone else was doing again. I’m like, one time won’t hurt. And that’s the problem, that one time. Your brain starts sparking up these ideas going, “Oh, I can go do this again. It’s fine.” No, it’s not fine.
But here’s the thing, don’t be hard on yourself. When you relapse, do not get hard on yourself and start saying, “I’m a terrible person. I shouldn’t do anything.” No, don’t even worry. You go back the next day and focus on one day at a time. Today. Today. Today. You say the word today when you get up. Today, great. You end up in a party, maybe you need to detach from certain events. Maybe you need to detach from certain cycles.
You are an average of the 5 people you spend time with. If you hang out with 5 alcoholics, you’re gonna be the sixth. If you hang out with 5 really powerful people, you’re going to be an amazing empowered person. You are who you hang out with? I had to stop going to places where I knew I’m going to relapse. I had to stop going to places where I knew I was going to turn into that again. So I changed my career. I changed everything. But having a why, and my why was my son.
You have a fire podcast called Laws of Attraction. You had Ryan Garcia on there and the entire episode, he’s literally hitting on you. He proposed to you on Instagram Live. What was your reaction?
I was like, no. Because he’s a cool guy.
Were you attracted to him at all?
No. He’s a wonderful human, I know that he will find a fucking amazing woman when he’s ready to be monogamous. I don’t deal with polyamory. I was trying to help him to understand it’s not polyamory darling, you just haven’t met the right one. He needed some advice. He’s like, “You are different.” All of a sudden, he’s literally taking the knee. It was batshit crazy. He said, “I’m literally ready whenever you decide to jump ship.”
You probably blew him away in person.
I said, you’re really sweet. He said: “I’m gonna buy you a $50 million mansion, because I’m about to go and do this match.” You know the one he just won? Apparently, he’s being tested right now for drugs.
So the $50 million house didn’t phase you at all?
No, because I love my life. You’d have to sweep me off my feet and I’m in a loving relationship. If I was in a relationship that was shite, then I’d definitely be in a different place. Also, I’m an independent woman. So buying me a house, and I’m not talking about him now. But anyone, if you did that: it was in my name, you gave it to me. It’s mine and I can take it back when I want, I don’t like that. It has to beL it’s all yours. It’s yours and do your thing, then I’ll probably sell it and give some to charity. I love where I am.
Talk about Tyla Yaweh surprising you at your baby shower with a ring. Were you completely surprised?
Completely surprised. Absolutely shell-shocked, and it was so beautiful. Because he had all his family there, it was a baby shower. All of a sudden, he said “Everyone come in the room.” I was hearing people say “we’re gonna play spin the bottle.” Why the fuck am I gonna kiss another person at my baby shower? I’m not playing, I’ll just sit on my throne and be a queen. All of a sudden, this guy is in front of me and crying and beautiful and in the moment. And takes the knee. He’s like, “I want to be with you forever. I want to make this forever.” And he did.
Because I know Tyla and I feel you changed him for the better.
Everyone says that. His family says that too. I get that a lot. You’ve changed this guy so much and it’s such a good thing.
How did you find him?
This is actually a funny story. After my previous partner, I was hanging out with this friend. A few friends. One of them put the radio on and there was a song, it was “City of Dreams” by Chris Brown with Tyla. Whoa, who’s this singer? I really like his voice. They were like, “Oh, that’s Tyla Yahweh.” I put him in my Instagram, I’m going to invite him on my show. But I also looked at him and had a feeling. He didn’t see the message I sent in August, he didn’t see it till October. Then in October, replies that yeah, I’m gonna come on your show. Yay, finally. He came on, and the rest is history.
Did you know right when you met him?
This is the funny thing. We met in October, but we didn’t start dating till December 7th. Because when we met, obviously I’m a Capricorn. As I told you earlier: when I want something, I will beeline it. Unless you are in a relationship, I will not do that. He was entangled, but not in. But the way he spoke about love! The way a man can make you feel when they talk about “I’m in love right now, and I love my women.” I want a man like that! Then I ended up manifesting him, crazy.
On the way out, my producers and people in the show said: “that connection of the two of you, that’s your guy.” I know, that’s my guy but he’s with someone! I would never go near it. So that day, I switched off. I just became a friend. I didn’t want to get involved with his untangling. I was super chilled and distant, being there for him as a friend. I switched it from I was into him to friend to being genuinely I’m going to be there for you like a coach. Call me when you need because I assure you there will be a day in your untangling when you need some help.
And he did. He called me, then it built from there. He was away touring, whatever. He came back December 6th. I just happened to call him that day like how are you doing?
The day he got back?
He goes, “I’ve just flown in and I am around.” I said I’ve got the Cartier event. But by the way, if I see you I’m wearing this crazy outfit, it’s lime green. It was made for me. We both show up to the event, we’re both wearing lime green. Neither of us wears lime green. It’s not a color we wear. That was it. The next day, we met up again. Had our next date. Bear in mind, we were friends, so it was a really weird thing when we first kissed. Because we were super chill, and then suddenly he was in my face. I said: are you gonna kiss me? Finally. He did and it was beautiful, that was it. He moved in. Straight off the rip, like boom.
Shirley’s Temple has a focus on mental health. Well, first of all, how are you doing?
I’m doing great. Thank you for asking. Of course doing great, but if you ask me another day, I might be not doing so great.
Is it the pregnancy hormones?
Oh God, they are really intense. You cry all the time. I’ve cried at least once a day. Not every day, but every other day. It’s just emotional. You get over it really quick because it’s different to other kinds of mental health, because I’ve had mental health challenges before. But where I’m at now, I have a toolbox. If something happens in my life, I know how to bounce back. Somebody who hasn’t had the mindset training, who doesn’t understand the power of their own mind, their thoughts, their words, their feelings, therefore their emotions and their habits doesn’t understand how to control those negative dark thoughts. Doesn’t understand how to control the anxiety. I’ve learned I have a toolbox which has been built over the last 7 years of you can’t knock me down. I say to people don’t judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I have fallen down and got back up.
One of them is the MBS method, right?
Yeah, the MBS method I created. It’s meditational behavioral synchronicity. It’s a form of meditation rooted in neuroscience. Combination of breathwork and meditation combined. You rewire your subconscious brain with new positive beliefs, you remove all of the limiting beliefs that have blocked you. Anything that’s been inside of you that you feel is blocking you. You go through this whole journey for about 15, 20 minutes. Some of them are shorter or longer. The other side of it, you really come out with more positive beliefs about yourself and more long-lasting positive changes.
You touched on a car accident at 10 years old where you lost your sister Isabella, and how your mom blamed your dad for it. How did you heal from that trauma?
When something happens to you in your life, it can happen at any point. A lot of our memories which are stored in our mind, between the ages of zero to 7, those formative years they store as trauma. However small, however big it is. Things can happen later on in life and they feel like concrete in your mind. How do we eliminate those traumas and get rid of them? Well, we could go to therapy for years. Or you can go into states of a different awareness point.
For example, doing a deep guided meditation regularly to remove blocks and limiting beliefs. You can do past-life regression. You can do hypnosis, self-hypnosis. You can have somebody do it with you to go straight to that place of what’s going on. The problem is a lot of people don’t even know the trauma that they’ve been through. So many people don’t realize: “why am I treating this girl so bad? Why do I have a commitment issue? Why do I run from all problems? Why do I hate confrontation?” I could go on and on. Any problem has come from something that you’ve been through.
The way that my mum blamed my dad for the crash at the time because he was driving. The way that I felt so saddened by what was going on with seeing my sister passed away, was a lot. It was tough. And I was young, that stored as a trauma. I only realized how bad that trauma had stored. It doesn’t matter how big or small, it’s when you realize that the point where your outer life, your outer reality is being affected by your inner reality. What’s going on? I had to do some hypnosis work and some meditation to work out why I felt like I did. Why did I feel so down about life? Why did I feel all these things? It was because I had lost my sister. My parents then got divorced shortly after, etc. So I watched a series of bad events happen, I thought this is going to happen to me. And of course, it did. I went through a divorce.
I was going to ask if that was a concern.
For sure, I know it was because I didn’t feel worthy. Well my parents did this, so surely, it’s going to happen to me. I manifested it. Trauma is something that we have to work on, particularly before we go into a relationship. The first thing I ask somebody if I’m going to date them is, are you healed? Or when I’m helping someone manifest love, are you healed? Because they’re usually like, “woo.” So many times, people are like, “No, I’m not healed.” So many people have no idea. They’re so far from being healed because they haven’t done the work on themselves, or they don’t want to. We have to do the work on ourselves in order to be a better person for everybody around us, including our partner. If we don’t do the work on ourselves, we reflect all of that bad energy of something that we went through onto everybody else around us. Don’t bleed on other people, do the work on yourself!
And I know your dad cheated on your mom. How did you fix your trust issues?
I still very lightly have them. I’ve done so much work on myself overcoming it and letting go, forgiveness towards my dad, forgiveness towards everybody involved, forgiveness, to myself, forgiveness. Then I cheated on somebody. Because in my mind, I feel more approved of myself. Then I never ever ever did it again.
Did it feel absolutely horrible?
Horrendous. I also had it happen to me, I’m like I can’t deal with this. I’ve got to go to the root of the problem. When you do things like meditation, you can find what is going on inside of you that needs to be removed. That needs to be raised. And when you find that issue, you can root it out and plant seeds of joy, of love, of happiness, and everything else.
Photo Credit: Courtesy of Shirley’s Temple
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